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So you think you've got it all figured out

Home, work, social life, sports activities. Life. Balancing everything is easy when it all aligns. But take one of those things out and twist it and the rest turns into a knot similar to the one that can form when you put your earphones in your pocket and after you take them out you are unable to easily untie them. Resolving such mayhem is not easy. Regarding earphones I just usually shake them around with rage until they untie themselves but in life I deal with it differently. I put all of my focus to that one issue which needs resolving and after I manage that, the rest falls into place again. At this moment though, there are few knots which need straightening and it is really difficult to stay calm and positive while resolving. Everything was going pretty well and smooth. My biggest issue might have been my zits coming all over my face due to hormonal changes. And then, out of the blue and all of a sudden one thing led to another and my work and family situation collapsed just as in...
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Oh, hello there!

I abandoned this blog with no intention of continuing taking care of it, ever. To my surprise each and every week I keep on receiving notifications of this blog being viewed. Is it any of my ex's who is curious what is new with me? Is it any of my colleagues who think they will know more about me coming here rather than asking me questions face to face? Is it my father, although he doesn't speak nearly any English? I don't know. Maybe those are random visitors who come across my blog accidentally. I still keep on writing. I keep my personal journal where I mostly come to more and more interesting conclusions and discoveries about myself. I would say that since I stopped publishing my posts I finally came to realize a few things about myself. I found out why from a lively kid did I turn so shy. Also, I did finally admit to myself that I am insecure, but now I know why. I am just not sure do I really need to tell you about it. It does feel very revolutionary and there is a s...
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Love fool.

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'Romeo and Juliet', when I was in high school I used to hate this play. I could never sit patiently in the classroom and discuss how tragic it was for two innocent lovers to take their lives away in the name of love. The star- crossed love. But recently I had to watch Baz Luhrmann's 'Romeo + Juliet' as I was invited to participate in a 'taster day' at the university. I joined a second year group discussing how Luhrmann's film adapts the very classical Shakespeare's play. Despite young Leonardo diCaprio and his very romantic/boy- ish appearance (skinny, no chest/facial hair/blond and dreamy) I have enjoyed myself re- watching this film quite a lot. First of all, the prologue of 'Romeo and Juliet' seems to be imprinted in my memory as from now on: 'Two households, both alike in dignity, In fair Verona, where we lay our scene..' I come from no dignified household yet still, I know the feeling when you want to go after som...
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Polish psycho.

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Monday, 11th of April 2016 On my way home I decided that in the evening I will sit down to read and if there will be enough time I could write as well. When I got home I realized that first I need to clean up the place a bit, cook a dinner, throw the dirty laundry in the washing machine and pay one outstanding bill. When I finally got to paying the bill I looked at three books lying next to each other on my coffee table. I was trying to decide which one to read while I remembered I also have to get familiar with a piece of text for my participation in a 'taster day' at the university (I will join one class to get an idea of what is it going to be like to be a student). As soon as I started up my laptop to search for the excerpt in my e-mail I got reminded that tomorrow is Tuesday and it's time to get a new blog post ready. I feel like I am not able to catch up with everything. Not to mention the war that I have in my mind about several issues. 'Should I send my fa...
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Love- hate relationship, pt. II: 'From Edam to the Dam'

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Typical Dutch birthday party. I already ate my piece of apple pie (apple crumble pie, of course) accompanied by a coffee straight from the one and only Senseo coffee machine, so now I am politely waiting to be asked whether I wish to have a beer or some wine. Instead of being offered a life- saving beverage the mother of the host walks up to me in her 3/4 white legging and a Miss Etam dress with a clear intention to engage  small talk. First she compliments me with my Dutch (because I had to say 'Gefeliciteerd' about 15 times before I was done with all the birthday girl's family members) and then after looking at me as if I needed consolation and some reassurance, too, she adds: 'So, do you like it  here ?' First of all: why yes, I do! Weed is legal and you can freely speak about using XTC. Nah, just joking. Although it's true. Then second of all: I am not sure if you (addressing this at the Dutch nation) realize, that each time I hear this question I notice...
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Love- hate relationship, pt. I

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From time to time, when meeting new people I am being repeatedly asked the same two questions. Question #1: ' Do you miss Poland ?' Question #2: ' So, do you like it here?' My natural reaction to both of the above stated questions is rolling my eyes, smiling politely and nodding: I never want to get into the details of probable answers because if I would, it wouldn't be a small talk anymore. I don't do small talk and if I do I am very awkward at it. I avoid it at all possible costs yet still, sometimes it finds me and bites me in the ass. Given the opportunity to speak (yes, I gave it to myself with the very first moment I created this highly popular blog) I have decided to explain a little about those question you love to ask the expats so much. Here we go! Do I miss Poland ? I had a very good reason to leave but now I am finding more and more reasons not to ever go back. Sure, I wish I could see my brother and my friend...
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Crucified bunny.

Each year around Christmas and Easter I get a little nostalgic.  Am I religious? Hell no. Do I miss my parents? Nope. Do I miss Poland? It's almost impossible to answer 'no'. But the feelings are very mixed. I guess that when it comes to holidays it's only natural for me to feel a little torn inside. For 21 years of my life I have been spending each and every smaller or bigger holiday together with my family and friends. Poland, as a so- called Catholic country, does a great job celebrating whatever there is to be celebrated that involves God, Jesus, Holy Mary or any other saint. We fast, we wait, we pray, we cook, we eat, we drink, we come together, we fight, we eat, we drink.. etc. At some point though, you start to wonder whether all those rituals come straight from your heart or is it a trandition which somehow turned into an annual habit. 'Do I celebrate Easter because I am deeply moved by the crucifiction and death of J.C. or do I celebrate it for the party t...
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